As an astrologer, one of the primary topics when in session is relationship. Freud summed up what concerns people the most: love and work.
“Love” = relationships, even the ones that we don’t love.
Relationships can be with a partner, spouse, child, parent, sibling, boss, friend or co-worker…. in short anyone with whom you connect.
Some of these are hard/impossible to feel the love, yet somehow we must deal with them. I’ve come to the conclusion that relationships are the hardest thing we do on this Earth.
Many of us strive to have a life rich in relationships; they take a great deal of work. Don’t be deceived in the belief that the monastic hermit has the true spiritual path.
The real road to spiritual insight is to learn to love. Yet we are so different!
And some people in your life may be downright unlovable. The way to true understanding as to how to relate to any person is through your mirror. It’s not easy, but the bottom line is that if you want someone else to change, you start with yourself.
I learned this the hard way as I pulled myself up after a failed marriage. There is no magical antidote to instant perfect relationships.
My ex-husband did inadvertently teach me that important lesson: the only person I can change is myself.
Pick a relationship that you’d like to improve. Instead of a conversation about how the other person needs to change, what can you do to alter the dialogue?
It can be as simple as not reacting to something that they always say that sets you off. Some relationships feel like an animated gif-
-we get caught in that repeat reel.
Breath work is key.
When you feel that impulsive response, it’s probably not going to get you anywhere new.
Take a breath, exhale and then breathe in again.
Sometimes just that conscious moment of breath can delay the repetitive black hole of repeating patterns.
The first step is to want to change the repeat reel.